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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  16:37:32  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote  Delete Topic
While perusing Realms books on Amazan today I stumbled across some Salvatore audio books featuring short stories from various anthologies. It seems like the story Comrades at Odds has Ice-T reading audio version. I don't think I can conjure a worse reader for a Realms audio book than Ice-T. Interesting choice on that one.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00MN1NAYC/ref=s9_simh_gw_p129_d0_i4?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=desktop-2&pf_rd_r=12HQ6TX2D4P3XC8VNZ2D&pf_rd_t=36701&pf_rd_p=1970566542&pf_rd_i=desktop

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede

Edited by - Artemas Entreri on 31 Mar 2015 16:38:32

xaeyruudh
Master of Realmslore

USA
1853 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  18:15:18  Show Profile  Visit xaeyruudh's Homepage Send xaeyruudh a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Yea, I saw him talking about reading a D&D book for Audible or whoever else. It was clear that he'd never played D&D, and wasn't about to start now. I was wondering why he'd done it. Dude must have been really desperate for a paycheck.
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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  19:53:44  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote
If he had any left to begin with, Ice-T now has ZERO street-cred.

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede
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xaeyruudh
Master of Realmslore

USA
1853 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  20:10:02  Show Profile  Visit xaeyruudh's Homepage Send xaeyruudh a Private Message  Reply with Quote


I think being on Law & Order SVU removed all vestiges of street-cred. But his character was decent, and he got a different sort of cred from that. But this might nullify whatever kind of cred that was... that might be why he came off the way he did... trying to remain the tough guy.

He's on my list of "people it would be interesting to meet" but I don't have high hopes that we would have anything in common.

The only PG-rated quote I've seen: "Let me read some porno or something. I know about that."

Classic.
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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  20:28:04  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I actually might buy this audio short story just to hear Ice-T attempt to pronounce Guenhwyvar...

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede
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xaeyruudh
Master of Realmslore

USA
1853 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  21:43:20  Show Profile  Visit xaeyruudh's Homepage Send xaeyruudh a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Around the 10th time he says Drizzt, he should suddenly yell "Zzt. Zzt. Zzt. Bring me a flyswatter!" With several well-placed bits of profanity of course.
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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 31 Mar 2015 :  22:16:32  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Oh goodness. It makes you wonder though. If Ice-T is who they decided to hire for this project, who in the Nine Hells did they turn down?

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede
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BEAST
Master of Realmslore

USA
1714 Posts

Posted - 01 Apr 2015 :  07:10:58  Show Profile  Visit BEAST's Homepage Send BEAST a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Roseanne Barr.

And Gilbert Gottfried.



I think even Ice-T would've thrown shade when he read a line that the hero carries a sword named "Twinkle".

"Nah, for real, dough, dawg. You just pullin' a brothah's leg, now. How I'm gon' get on dis mic and say dis dude be bustin' out a blade named 'Twinkle' and &%*($*?!!

"What you gon' tell me next: that dis dude be ridin' dirty on some kind of unicorn fartin' sparkles and rockin' tha bells?"


"Well, actually, Mr. T, funny that you should mention that--"

"AW, HELL NAH!"


"'You don't know my history,' he said dryly."
--Drizzt Do'Urden (The Pirate King, Part 1: Chapter 2)

<"Comprehensive Chronology of R.A. Salvatore Forgotten Realms Works">

Edited by - BEAST on 01 Apr 2015 07:45:08
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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 01 Apr 2015 :  15:37:22  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by BEAST

Roseanne Barr.

And Gilbert Gottfried.



I think even Ice-T would've thrown shade when he read a line that the hero carries a sword named "Twinkle".

"Nah, for real, dough, dawg. You just pullin' a brothah's leg, now. How I'm gon' get on dis mic and say dis dude be bustin' out a blade named 'Twinkle' and &%*($*?!!

"What you gon' tell me next: that dis dude be ridin' dirty on some kind of unicorn fartin' sparkles and rockin' tha bells?"


"Well, actually, Mr. T, funny that you should mention that--"

"AW, HELL NAH!"






Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede
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Areader
Acolyte

USA
14 Posts

Posted - 16 Apr 2015 :  21:07:46  Show Profile Send Areader a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I just received today from Amazon.com R.A. Salvatore the Collected Stories audiobook on mp3.

All of his short Realms fiction is here and the readers include:

Felicia Day (from the Guild and Supernatural)
Dan Harmon (creator of Communtiy)
Greg Grunberg (from Heroes)
Tom Felton (from Harry Potter)
Danny Pudi (Abed from Communtiy)
Sean Astin (Samwise himself)
Melissa Rauch (from Big Bang Theory)
Wil Wheaton (aka Wesley Crusher)
Weird Al Yankovic
Michael Chiklis (from the Shield)
David Duchovny (aka Fox Mulder)
And the already mentioned, Ice-T

A fairly impressive cast for an audiobook anthology.
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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 16 Apr 2015 :  21:14:45  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Mmmm, Felicia Day.

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
Moderator

USA
36779 Posts

Posted - 16 Apr 2015 :  21:33:35  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Areader


Melissa Rauch (from Big Bang Theory)



I hope her voice from the show is only used on the show. If she uses that voice to read any story, by any author, I'm not going to listen to it.

At my bachelor party (which predated Melissa Rauch's appearance on BBT), there was a stripper with a similar voice. Needless to say, her attempts to talk dirty to me did not work at all.

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BEAST
Master of Realmslore

USA
1714 Posts

Posted - 17 Apr 2015 :  03:20:28  Show Profile  Visit BEAST's Homepage Send BEAST a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Areader

A fairly impressive cast for an audiobook anthology.

It's wicked awesome maintstream brandbuilding, just like getting voice actors from popular TV shows Happy Days and Eight is Enough to appear on the D&D cartoon back in the '80s, was.

But I would still rather they found authentic-sounding old-timey tale-spinners to do their narrations. I can't help but be conscious of these celebrities' other work when I hear them reading these stories. Sorry.

quote:
Originally posted by Wooly Rupert

I hope her voice from the show is only used on the show. If she uses that voice to read any story, by any author, I'm not going to listen to it.

At my bachelor party (which predated Melissa Rauch's appearance on BBT), there was a stripper with a similar voice. Needless to say, her attempts to talk dirty to me did not work at all.

"Oh, HOWIE!!!"

"Tawk dirty t'me!"

"'You don't know my history,' he said dryly."
--Drizzt Do'Urden (The Pirate King, Part 1: Chapter 2)

<"Comprehensive Chronology of R.A. Salvatore Forgotten Realms Works">
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Rymac
Learned Scribe

USA
315 Posts

Posted - 17 Apr 2015 :  06:58:45  Show Profile  Visit Rymac's Homepage Send Rymac a Private Message  Reply with Quote
No Vin Diesel? I know he played some D&D back in the day. Especially if he did the read in the voice of the Iron Giant.
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Artemas Entreri
Great Reader

USA
3131 Posts

Posted - 17 Apr 2015 :  15:10:59  Show Profile Send Artemas Entreri a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Rymac

No Vin Diesel? I know he played some D&D back in the day. Especially if he did the read in the voice of the Iron Giant.



I'd love the see Vin Diesel roleplay a Bard.

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way. -Steve Martin

Amazon "KindleUnlimited" Free Trial: http://amzn.to/2AJ4yD2

Try Audible and Get 2 Free Audio Books! https://amzn.to/2IgBede
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