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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:08:38  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by keftiu

So why not contribute instead of trying to combat me for this entire page?


Contribute what? You've stated that the overwhelming majority of Realms characters are 'straight and cis'.

That is very far from the Realms as I know them.

Are the published Realms insufficiently detailed about customs and mores in various societies, especially as they related to sexuality and gender? Sure.

Which, as far as I can see, leaves us with reading between the lines and/or going to unpuplished answers from Ed. But it's not especially helpful if you go assigning sexual identities that aren't even a thing in the Realms to characters, without any support in textual sources.

There have probably been several thousands NPCs published in the Realms (most in Volo's guides and novels), as well as a few thousand more in various stuff Ed Greenwood and a few others have written in various online sources. As far as I can determine, maybe a few dozen, at most, are explicitly established as 'straight' or heterosexual. Perhaps a few more are established as cisgender (mostly if we have details of their childhood), but given how many NPCs are presented just as they are now, with little history given, I'm pretty sure it's still a huge minority.

Most of the 'iconic' Realms characters are not 'straight' by any measure and hard to call 'cis-gender' either. Elminster and the Seven Sisters certainly aren't, not over their entire existence (they're all pansexual on a pretty consistent basis, but gender-fluidity is more situational, but most of them have lived for some time as another gender than they were born).

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Edited by - Icelander on 04 Aug 2020 23:09:00
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Ashe Ravenheart
Great Reader

USA
3240 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:40:46  Show Profile Send Ashe Ravenheart a Private Message  Reply with Quote
The issue, dear Icelander, is that people are sick of "reading between the lines" to feel like they belong.

I actually DO know everything. I just have a very poor index of my knowledge.

Ashe's Character Sheet

Alphabetized Index of Realms NPCs
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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:46:45  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Ashe Ravenheart

The issue, dear Icelander, is that people are sick of "reading between the lines" to feel like they belong.


That's really not what the purpose of reading between the lines of published Realmslore is for. It's already explicitly clear that your character belongs in the Realms and that any expression of theirselves and their sexuality is valid.

Reading between the lines is necessary to establish societal details that aren't explored in published Realmslore, because a) There's much less detail available on Realms cultures than Earth ones, and b) Most of what has been published for the Realms has been published in the US for an audience of children, so there are a lot of lacunae in the material.

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keftiu
Senior Scribe

656 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:48:23  Show Profile Send keftiu a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Icelander

quote:
Originally posted by Ashe Ravenheart

The issue, dear Icelander, is that people are sick of "reading between the lines" to feel like they belong.


That's really not what the purpose of reading between the lines of published Realmslore is for. It's already explicitly clear that your character belongs in the Realms and that any expression of theirselves and their sexuality is valid.

Reading between the lines is necessary to establish societal details that aren't explored in published Realmslore, because a) There's much less detail available on Realms cultures than Earth ones, and b) Most of what has been published for the Realms has been published in the US for an audience of children, so there are a lot of lacunae in the material.



“You belong and are valid” and “we will almost never explicitly include you” are sentiments that are at odds with each other.

4e fangirl. Here to queer up the Realms.
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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:52:47  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by keftiu

“You belong and are valid” and “we will almost never explicitly include you” are sentiments that are at odds with each other.


You're choosing to project real-world issues onto Realms NPCs and assume that they are 'straight and cis' when nothing explicitly establishes this.

That's a valid choice, if that's the Realms you want, but if it isn't, then I don't really understand why you'd do that.

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keftiu
Senior Scribe

656 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:56:10  Show Profile Send keftiu a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Icelander

quote:
Originally posted by keftiu

“You belong and are valid” and “we will almost never explicitly include you” are sentiments that are at odds with each other.


You're choosing to project real-world issues onto Realms NPCs and assume that they are 'straight and cis' when nothing explicitly establishes this.

That's a valid choice, if that's the Realms you want, but if it isn't, then I don't really understand why you'd do that.



Again, this thread is to talk about queer culture and characters in this setting. I’ve read a decent handful of Realms stuff - all of Salvatore’s work, the Haunted Lands trilogy, several of the fiction anthologies, a few other novels, and a small mountain of sourcebooks and adventures - and I can’t tell you about any men in love with men, or women in love with women. I can name a single trans man (in a 5e adventure, with an incredibly minor role) and one nonbinary character (who was handled poorly, IMO). /Please/ show me where I’m wrong instead of acting smug and arguing in bad faith.

4e fangirl. Here to queer up the Realms.
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Ashe Ravenheart
Great Reader

USA
3240 Posts

Posted - 04 Aug 2020 :  23:59:15  Show Profile Send Ashe Ravenheart a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Icelander, you feel that there is representation for everyone in spirit, and in the games they play. But the published stories of the realms are all cis-hetero (for the most part), and that's the part that keftiu and others want to change. Saying that the books are written for children doesn't hold water any more either, since there are non-cis/non-hetero in a LOT of stories that are available to children. Shows like Modern Family, and kids shows like The Dragon Prince and The Babysitter's Club (Netflix, 2020) have shown that you can tell a story for kids and STILL include those that don't fall into the "traditional" cis-hetero roles.

I actually DO know everything. I just have a very poor index of my knowledge.

Ashe's Character Sheet

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CorellonsDevout
Great Reader

USA
2708 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:01:03  Show Profile Send CorellonsDevout a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Material written for teen and children are still quite capable of representation (I've read a number of them). It's true that past Realms literature hasn't really had much in the way of openly bi/gay characters (and by this I mean characters who have clear preferences or are in same-sex relationships), due to general attitudes. This started to change in the more recent literature, before the novel line was halted, but YA books these days are actually quite diverse.

EDIT: apologies that I pretty much said the same thing as you, Ashe lol. I think we were typing at the same time.

Sweet water and light laughter

Edited by - CorellonsDevout on 05 Aug 2020 00:03:06
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keftiu
Senior Scribe

656 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:05:02  Show Profile Send keftiu a Private Message  Reply with Quote
To put it another way: to act like “queer characters are there if you imagine them, or assume that characters not explicitly to be cis and het aren’t despite no evidence to the contrary” is in any way a satisfying, acceptable approach to representation is absurd. Even if your argument that D&D was for children held up - and I’m pretty sure the scene where Drizzt’s sister is impregnated by a Balor was hardly intended for a young audience - we live in a world now where children’s media often has /more/ room for queer characters than mainstream media.

If WotC wants to slap “The World’s Greatest Roleplaying Game” on every cover and make the Realms their signature setting, the bar must be higher.

(Meanwhile, the newest Eberron book mentioned that gender transition services are available at Jorasco clinics across the setting).

4e fangirl. Here to queer up the Realms.

Edited by - keftiu on 05 Aug 2020 00:06:28
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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:08:42  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by keftiu

Again, this thread is to talk about queer culture and characters in this setting. I’ve read a decent handful of Realms stuff - all of Salvatore’s work, the Haunted Lands trilogy, several of the fiction anthologies, a few other novels, and a small mountain of sourcebooks and adventures - and I can’t tell you about any men in love with men, or women in love with women. I can name a single trans man (in a 5e adventure, with an incredibly minor role) and one nonbinary character (who was handled poorly, IMO). /Please/ show me where I’m wrong instead of acting smug and arguing in bad faith.


As far as I'm aware, no character Ed Greenwood has written is 'straight and cis'. From Elminster onward, they're all 'queer' in some way. Syluné, Alustriel, Dove, Storm, Laeral, the Simbul, Qilué, all of the Knights of Myth Drannor, Myrmheen Lhal, Caladnei, Alusair Obarskyr, etc. None of these people are 'straight', in our terms.

Sure, well over 95% of named characters in the Realms are never shown in a romantic or sexual context in published materials, because they are presented in short blurb of text as innkeepers, merchants, etc. That means that the GM decides on anything not mentioned, which usually includes anything relating to attraction, romance, sexual interest, etc.

Judging from what Ed has answered over the years, the most accurate portrayal of the Realms would be for most of them to have at some point been attracted to people of more than one gender.

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Ashe Ravenheart
Great Reader

USA
3240 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:09:37  Show Profile Send Ashe Ravenheart a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by keftiu
Again, this thread is to talk about queer culture and characters in this setting. I’ve read a decent handful of Realms stuff - all of Salvatore’s work, the Haunted Lands trilogy, several of the fiction anthologies, a few other novels, and a small mountain of sourcebooks and adventures - and I can’t tell you about any men in love with men, or women in love with women. I can name a single trans man (in a 5e adventure, with an incredibly minor role) and one nonbinary character (who was handled poorly, IMO). /Please/ show me where I’m wrong instead of acting smug and arguing in bad faith.

One example (written by Ed, no surprise) may be The Shadow of the Avatar trilogy, featuring the Rangers Three who end up in a relationship together.

I actually DO know everything. I just have a very poor index of my knowledge.

Ashe's Character Sheet

Alphabetized Index of Realms NPCs
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keftiu
Senior Scribe

656 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:15:08  Show Profile Send keftiu a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Ashe Ravenheart

quote:
Originally posted by keftiu
Again, this thread is to talk about queer culture and characters in this setting. I’ve read a decent handful of Realms stuff - all of Salvatore’s work, the Haunted Lands trilogy, several of the fiction anthologies, a few other novels, and a small mountain of sourcebooks and adventures - and I can’t tell you about any men in love with men, or women in love with women. I can name a single trans man (in a 5e adventure, with an incredibly minor role) and one nonbinary character (who was handled poorly, IMO). /Please/ show me where I’m wrong instead of acting smug and arguing in bad faith.

One example (written by Ed, no surprise) may be The Shadow of the Avatar trilogy, featuring the Rangers Three who end up in a relationship together.



I was pleasantly surprised to see Ed’s insistence that polyamory is incredibly widespread across the setting; I’m not poly myself, but almost everyone in my life is. Glad to see he got it into print!

4e fangirl. Here to queer up the Realms.
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CorellonsDevout
Great Reader

USA
2708 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:19:40  Show Profile Send CorellonsDevout a Private Message  Reply with Quote
@Keftiu: Brimstone Angels has a gay character, and Erin does a great job of weaving it into the story. The Shadowbane novels have Fox-At-Twilight, While mostly "straight" relationships, Evermeet: Island of Elves does mention how Corellon can switch form (and it is an awesome book). The Unbroken Chain duology--sadly it wasn't continued--while not explicitly stated, I got some strong vibes.

Of course I wish there were more (heck, I wish there were more novels, period), but if you are looking, I would suggest those (and they are good books in general).

Sweet water and light laughter

Edited by - CorellonsDevout on 05 Aug 2020 00:22:16
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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:22:19  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I wonder what the correlation between gender identity and sexual preferences in real life and that of PCs is.

That is, do scribes generally create and roleplay characters who match them in terms of gender identity, genders to whom they are attracted, sexual behaviour, etc.?

For me, the correlation is very low, if any, but I suspect that is is because I'm rarely a player, much more often the GM, and when I create PCs, I usually try to be as different from other characters I've played as I can, which means that there is very little correlation between them at all.

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keftiu
Senior Scribe

656 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:39:53  Show Profile Send keftiu a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I’m overwhelmingly the GM, which is part of why I’ve developed such a fondness for GMless games!

When I do play a specific character, they’re usually women, whether cis or trans, though I’ve played a few non-binary characters as well, and hope to play more soon. One of the big signs I needed to come out was how many women I played, funnily enough. I haven’t had a male PC in... six years? And he was bi. I’m a trans lesbian; I joke often that I pretended to be a man long enough, and don’t need it in my roleplaying. I don’t remember any characters I’ve played in a long while who were attracted to men. I should note that I wrote several trans men and non-binary characters in my Eberron book.

My gaming group these days is entirely trans women and non-binary or genderqueer folks of varying orientations, and we see a lot of variety, though comparatively few characters using he/him pronouns.

4e fangirl. Here to queer up the Realms.

Edited by - keftiu on 05 Aug 2020 00:41:16
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CorellonsDevout
Great Reader

USA
2708 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  00:58:35  Show Profile Send CorellonsDevout a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I am a cis female asexual who is demiromantic (or maybe biromantic), and the characters I roleplay are typically male and gay/bi. I have always identified as female, but in games and writing (though my professional writing has a variety, as I wouldn't want an all-one-gender cast), I prefer playing male characters.

Sweet water and light laughter
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Baltas
Senior Scribe

Poland
955 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  01:00:14  Show Profile Send Baltas a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Well, quite a bit happened here...

To keftiu and Icelander-

keftiu, I'm sure with exceptions, Icelander meant from the norms Ed described, and also how relationships work withing various parts of Toril.

I do agree with keftiu there is a massive underpresentation of non-straight relationships, which makes seem the people in the Realms come of as in vast amount, again in real life terms, straight.
(Similar situation with non-cis characters).

As CorellonsDevout mentioned, teen and child stories can present well characters on the LGBT spectrum (and do it now more and more often), and D&D while marketed to children and young teens (among things), has plenty of mature material, especially in novels and comics - multiple novels dealt with brutal killing, rape, and other darker aspects.

Returning to Kurushumgal/Ushum-Apiru/Ningishzida, you're right about the nature of divinity and them quite possibly being the Ningishzida Ningishzida.

About an example that's more strongly hinted, the "Sea of Fallen Stars" sourcebook, has a legend presented, that very strongly hints Selûne and Eldath are or were lovers:
quote:
Olone
(o-LAHN-ay)
An old mythic tale within the oral traditions of both
the whales and some worshipers of Eldath names the full
moon as Olone, a former lover of the Green Goddess.
He was once a mortal merman who fought Umberlee to
protect his lover from her wrath, and she evilly changed
him into a bubble to rise up, far away from his beloved
ocean. Olone and Eldath remain ever apart, but his staring
eye coolly lights the depths without disturbing them
as he watches his love. Even when worshipers of Selûne
try to educate them otherwise about the moon and
godly powers, they cling to this old romantic myth, and
the whalesongs about Olone also keep the name alive.


Olone appears to be a corruption/variation of Selune's name, and even functions, with probably cetacean and Eldathyn lore changing Selune to a male mortal possibly based on her creating a masculine merman avatar in the past(alongside with other hints, like the rather difficulty of a mortal merman fighting a deity).
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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 05 Aug 2020 :  01:05:51  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I think I have a grand total of two PCs I've played in the Realms. One male who was asexual (he was a necromancer, a sociopath and was disgusted by pretty much all living people got up to) and one female who would not have understood the concept of sexual identity, but we might call pansexual. Well, theoretically, I guess, but she was pretty young and the sum total of her experience to that point did not actually include any romantic relationship with positive emotional content to it. She, uh, may have had some issues and/or BPD.

Huh. Are the only two characters I've played in the Realms really both Evil? That's so weird, as I don't think I've played people in any other RPG campaign that were evil. I think these two came after a long-running PC in a Greyhawk campaign, who happened to be a paladin, so maybe each one was an attempt to distinguish them thoroughly from anything that might be similar to that PC.

Technically, my Neutral Evil necromancer didn't self-identify as any gender, but he certainly didn't care enough about the subject to correct people about pronouns. Easier to just pretend to be an unworldly, scholarly, absent-minded apprentice boy, recently orphaned (he killed his parents for their inheritance, which he needed for his studies). The other players were unaware of his amoral ways and he, in turn, was very solicitous of his unpaid bodyguards.

Edit: What does occur to me as a point of similarity for most, if not all, of characters that I have played, in or out of the Realms, is that they are usually set up in some way so that any kind of happy ending, in a romantic sense, is unlikely to impossible.

Some were established as hopelessly in love with an unavailable, dead or actively evil person, one was sworn to chastity, some were only attracted to people likely to make their lives worse, not better, etc.

It's a small sample size, but I figure that one contributing factor to this is that I tend to consider PCs as protagonists and, well, the story of a healthy, well-adjusted person who finds one or more people who make them happy and live in sensible communication and trust for ever after might be fun to live, but it doesn't make for nearly as many story hooks as the people full of melodrama.

I've also only played only one promiscuous character and that was directly after I played a PC who was literally sworn to chastity, so she was meant to be different from him in as many ways as I could find. That might just be a correlation with the fact that all of my PCs tend to be introspective and take everything in their lives very seriously.

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Edited by - Icelander on 05 Aug 2020 01:31:07
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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 16 Aug 2020 :  15:11:21  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I've noticed some things and made decisions based on that.

a) Chessenta as described in Old Empires is very like Ancient Greece.
b) In my Realms, at least, the Old Empires, at least those parts once ruled by Unther, have a strong tradition of erastes-eromanes romances.
c) A full 5% of the population of Chessenta consists of dwarves.
d) My view of the dwarven population of Chessenta is that they are integrated into human society, not segregated, and that their culture is thus distinct from dwarves who live in dwarfholds.
e) 70% of dwarven births are male.
f) Children of a dwarf and human parent will be dwarves and as long as 50% or more of the heritage of someone is dwarven, they'll be accepted among dwarves and have lifespans significantly longer than humans.
g) With 70% males and 30% females, less than half of Chessentan male dwarves will be able to find dwarven wives.
h) Dwarves do not mind mating with or even marrying human wives.

All of which leads me to decide that about half of Chessentan dwarves marry human wives. However, the different lifespans of dwarves and humans mean that dwarves who choose to do so will generally lose their wives before they are even middle-aged.

What this leads me to decide is that there is a strong tradition among Chessentan dwarves of a succession of younger lovers, either after the death of their wives or among dwarves who decide not to marry (and, of course, dwarves in open marriages or who simply cheat on their wives). Such relationships generally last only a few years, traditionally while the younger partner was in training for military service or undergoing such service, so the age of the younger partner would range from 13-20.

In comic theatre, the older dwarf is generally a very rich craftsman, often a goldsmith, and invariably besotted by his youthful athlete lover. In reality, most dwarves who elect such relationships take great care to avoid too strong emotional attachments, as they are protecting themselves from the heartbreak that would result from allowing themselves to fall in love with humans.

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Forgotten Realms fans, please sign a petition to re-release the FR Interactive Atlas

Edited by - Icelander on 16 Aug 2020 15:16:30
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
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Posted - 16 Aug 2020 :  18:17:05  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I'm thinking you posted that in the wrong discussion...

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Icelander
Master of Realmslore

1864 Posts

Posted - 16 Aug 2020 :  18:18:44  Show Profile  Visit Icelander's Homepage Send Icelander a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Wooly Rupert

I'm thinking you posted that in the wrong discussion...


I suppose it could have fit in both, but the point here is about a specific type of same-sex romantic relationships common among dwarves in Chessenta.

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Wooly Rupert
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Posted - 16 Aug 2020 :  19:04:14  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Icelander

quote:
Originally posted by Wooly Rupert

I'm thinking you posted that in the wrong discussion...


I suppose it could have fit in both, but the point here is about a specific type of same-sex romantic relationships common among dwarves in Chessenta.



My bad. I missed that part of the post.

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