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Ayrik
Great Reader
Canada
7969 Posts |
 Posted - 23 Jan 2018 : 03:28:24
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quote:
and here I thought you hated elves....
Nope, that's me.
And it's not so much that I "hate" elves, "hate" is far too strong a word. More that I "dislike" the unthinkingly blind love automatically offered to elves (and other fey creatures) by the popular media and the masses. |
[/Ayrik] |
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sfdragon
Great Reader
2285 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jan 2018 : 04:15:37
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no... I could have sworn I read markustay state that too.....
and sleyvas, umm you worry me
umm and aa... that beer might be a bigger hit with the scro |
why is being a wizard like being a drow? both are likely to find a dagger in the back from a rival or one looking to further his own goals, fame and power
My FR fan fiction
Magister's GAmbit
http://steelfiredragon.deviantart.com/gallery/33539234 |
Edited by - sfdragon on 23 Jan 2018 04:29:36 |
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Markustay
Realms Explorer extraordinaire
USA
15724 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jan 2018 : 09:01:57
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Yeah, I hate elves, and I love Orcs, but even so... that was just wrong on SO many levels.
Besides, I don't really picture elf-women being on the 'buxom' side - they tend toward slenderness. Makes the whole process even more weird, IMHO. Now, a plump little dwarf woman, thats another story. Just as gross, but doable.
What does 'work' for me is the idea that an Orc female (once again, thinking about Klingon Women here) would probably find it funny to 'whip one out' and spray an elf in the face, just to see his reaction (horrified look, everyone in the tavern laughing... that sort of thing). "Whats a matta, hun? Too 'real' for you? Maybe you should go back to your little fairy girls". I can SO see that.
I've played Orcs (well, half-orcs, but I always play them like full orcs), and I've played plenty of female characters, but I've never payed a vulgar orc woman. I'm going to have to try that - it sounds like fun. |
"I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me" --- Dudley Field Malone
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sfdragon
Great Reader
2285 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jan 2018 : 09:21:32
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| they wouldn't have to be buxom enough, said elf's breasts just have to be big enough,,,,, yeah ok... moving on |
why is being a wizard like being a drow? both are likely to find a dagger in the back from a rival or one looking to further his own goals, fame and power
My FR fan fiction
Magister's GAmbit
http://steelfiredragon.deviantart.com/gallery/33539234 |
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Ayrik
Great Reader
Canada
7969 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jan 2018 : 09:26:43
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Far be it for nasty old Ayrik to mini-moderate ... but this topic seems to be drifting into disgusting and irrelevant discourse.
Back to orc booze?
Can't say I really agree with the generic "orc = klingon" assertion. The two races do have some overlap but they're also very different creatures with very different roles in their respective settings. Klingons sure do like their bloodwine - or at least they proudly insist they do and keep enthusiastically drinking the stuff because that's what klingons do! And at least one klingon really likes his prune juice. But klingons also find human beverages like coffee and whisky (and "warm milk toddy") utterly repulsive, and exotic beverages like Romulan Ale (or perhaps elven Evermead?) somewhat flavourless and unpleasant. Some klingons just hurl their drinks away in disgust or openly pour them onto the ground, most just sniff and growl, while more civilized klingons (like Worf) politely avoid more than the requisite single cautious sip by saying things like "good tea, nice house" or "it seems to be an acquired taste".
On Deep Space Nine, Quark and Garak describe human root beer as "vile", "insidious", "bubbly, cloying, and happy". They both consider it horrible and instinctively cringe from the taste (and aftertaste). Apparently very few other races enjoy root beer, Quark says he's got 80 cases of the stuff sitting in his stockroom that he can't unload. "But you know what's really frightening? If you drink enough of it ... you begin to like it."
(And then Garak continues drinking his Kanar, a pulpy strong alcoholic much loved by Cardassians, even Cardassian children, but which other races can barely stomach and describe with "it takes a bit of getting used to".)
We know orcs like a lot of things humans (and elves, and dwarves) find repulsive. But there might be various liquors and delicacies which are prized by humans (and elves, and dwarves) which orcs find utterly foul and undrinkable. There are certainly some dwarven drinks nobody else can tolerate, and some human drinks which elves never consume, and even human drinks (like licorice-flavoured alcohols) which some humans love and others despise. I don't imagine orcs to be so completely undiscriminating in their palette that they'll just guzzle anything from anywhere, they must have some preferences, and they would probably create their own beverages to suit these preferences. |
[/Ayrik] |
Edited by - Ayrik on 23 Jan 2018 10:25:52 |
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Markustay
Realms Explorer extraordinaire
USA
15724 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jan 2018 : 20:48:44
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I don't know, I find Orcs and Klingons very similar, especially post-Star Trek the Movie (1st movie), when they 'got all ugly'. Klingons are just Scro - a bit smarter and better trained, and like to play in space. I can so definitely see Orcs eating Gagh. Come to think of it, Klingons must have been disappointed as hell the first time they ate at a human restaurant and ordered 'Worms & Dirt'. 
As far as their cultures go, I think during St:tNG's tenure as 'THE Star trek', they swapped the cultures of Klingons and Romulans around from how they originally were (Romulans used to be about honor, and Klingons were direputable - they seem to have flip-flopped with tNG).
And BTW, thanks for letting me know I'm a Fernegi.
Even though I have small ears, am tall, don't really hiss at stuff...
But I would gladly go to war against the abomination that is Root Beer. I recall the first time I tasted it as a child and thought, "why would people drink this stuff?" And I'm a guy who finds Guiness and Yaegermeister delightful.  |
"I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me" --- Dudley Field Malone
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Edited by - Markustay on 23 Jan 2018 20:50:15 |
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sfdragon
Great Reader
2285 Posts |
Posted - 24 Jan 2018 : 00:18:51
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| mmmmm root beer.... |
why is being a wizard like being a drow? both are likely to find a dagger in the back from a rival or one looking to further his own goals, fame and power
My FR fan fiction
Magister's GAmbit
http://steelfiredragon.deviantart.com/gallery/33539234 |
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sleyvas
Skilled Spell Strategist
USA
11695 Posts |
Posted - 24 Jan 2018 : 00:23:12
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quote:
Originally posted by Markustay
And BTW, thanks for letting me know I'm a Fernegi.
Even though I have small ears, am tall, don't really hiss at stuff...
But I would gladly go to war against the abomination that is Root Beer. I recall the first time I tasted it as a child and thought, "why would people drink this stuff?" And I'm a guy who finds Guiness and Yaegermeister delightful.
SACRILEGE!!!!! Next you'll say you don't drink cream soda (of either red, vanilla, or the butterscotch variety)! |
Alavairthae, may your skill prevail
Phillip aka Sleyvas |
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sfdragon
Great Reader
2285 Posts |
Posted - 24 Jan 2018 : 00:45:05
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mmmmm orange cream soda.........
ummm back to orc beer or I go back to...... root beer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOXI6giLMGU
anyway I would imagine that orc beer would state that it was made of one thing and go and say on the back of the label what it is really made of.
ie:
Orcish elven screams: made from 5 drops of elven breast milk on the front of the label.
and the back it says ingredients: fermented goat milk, honey, hops, wheat, fish scales, corn, honey and contains 15% alcohol.
brewers note: no I never make it with elven breast milk, I just put it there just to see who I could disgust.- Or'thmar of ManyArrows keep |
why is being a wizard like being a drow? both are likely to find a dagger in the back from a rival or one looking to further his own goals, fame and power
My FR fan fiction
Magister's GAmbit
http://steelfiredragon.deviantart.com/gallery/33539234 |
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Markustay
Realms Explorer extraordinaire
USA
15724 Posts |
Posted - 24 Jan 2018 : 00:49:21
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Cream Soda is the ONLY soda I enjoy. I also drink gingerale, in a pinch, but otherwise avoid soda like the plague it is.
One caveat - at Burger Kings now, I notice they have these 'create your own beverage' type dispensers, and you can add vanilla to just about anything. Now, I don't go to BK very often, but now when I do, I always get Sprite with vanilla - it makes for a delicious cream Soda substitute! 
Now back to beer..
I was just reading some stuff about goblins, and apparently they sometimes supplement their diets with crushed rock. It doesn't say they derive any nutritional value from it, but it doesn't say they don't either. I would have to guess they're just doing it to 'feel full' in times of hunger because biologically, I can't see how that is going to do anything for someone... even a goblin. I guess they don't have to worry about their daily mineral requirement.
ANYWAY, my point in mentioning that was that maybe we should be thinking outside the box for non-humans (as Dalor did with the boobear). There is no reason why non-humans wouldn't be using untraditional substances in their drinks. I can definitely see elves using a lot of barks and leaves. So what grows on mountainsides? Some hardy berry types. Some prickly bushes and maybe scrub-trees. Some cacti (there are cold weather varieties). But what about bugs? Vermin? Can a drink be made out of that? Maybe some sort of beetle's juices?
And what about fermented piss? Is that even possible? Probably too acidic. Maybe there is some sort of plant fiber they can pour it through to filter-out most of the acids? And then add some crushed berries and make some sort of nasty 'jail house' hootch?
Crushed rock, though, is a rough one (pun intended). Maybe they get water from a reddish-tinged source because of iron/rust? I know there is one stream or pond in the Stonelands like that (it appeared in the Cormyr trilogy). So 'rusty water' beer? Humans couldn't drink it, but Orcs would probably have no problem. A drink made from sea water. Very salty... maybe Orcs and dwarves would love the stuff, and everyone else would find it disgusting.
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"I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me" --- Dudley Field Malone
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Edited by - Markustay on 24 Jan 2018 00:54:04 |
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Orc beer
