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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 11 Jul 2011 :  17:19:28  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Update on HONOR AMONG THIEVES: Chapter 6 is online at my website, http://www.elainecunningham.com/. It's posted in two parts, so be sure to read part 1 first.
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Kajehase
Great Reader

Sweden
2104 Posts

Posted - 11 Jul 2011 :  19:14:18  Show Profile Send Kajehase a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Wooly Rupert

quote:
Originally posted by ElaineCunningham

quote:
Originally posted by Kajehase

Speaking of out-of-print books... I picked up The Radiant Dragon from Paizo last week!!!



The Radiant Dragon? From PAIZO?





Paizo apparently got a lot of older stock from another company, and was letting it go at some reasonable prices. I myself just placed an order for some older Mage material that I never got the first time around.



Woolpert has the right of it. And based on Ashe's information, I'm glad I pounced.

There is a rumour going around that I have found god. I think is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist.
Terry Pratchett
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 14 Jul 2011 :  12:56:30  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I posted a YouTube link on my facebook page to the High Kings performing the traditional Irish tune "The Wild Rover." It's one of several tunes I can never hear without battling the compulsion to compose bawdy filk versions from a dwarf woman's point of view. Last night a couple of verses broke free. This morning I woke up with several more, fully formed. Here they are, because why should I suffer alone?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JP4qSiJX3kQ


THE ELF LOVER

I'm a dwarf from Clan Disney (the lads from Snow White),
And I keep very busy the whole blessed night.
Then I got to thinking it might be sublime
To try seven inches, but all at one time.

CHORUS: But it's no, nay, never. No nay never no more
Will I take an elf lover. No, never no more.

So I left clan and tunnels for starlight and trees
And I picked up an elf with the greatest of ease.
Oh, gold were his tresses and blue were his eyes
And vast was his lust for a woman of size.

REPEAT CHORUS

They say elves are frisky. They say elves are great,
But I cannot be certain the durned elf was straight.
He read odes and sonnets my beauty to praise,
But no lips did he plunder, no skirts did he raise.

REPEAT CHORUS

He plied me with flowers and gemstones and song,
'Til I shrieked in frustration, "What's taking so long?"
"I know you're immortal, but this just won't do.
"Carry on--I'll be back in an hour or two."

REPEAT CHORUS

So he practiced his sonnets in front of the glass
And he primped and he preened like a pretty blond ass.
I went back to the clanhold some dwarf lads to find,
For I'll get there much faster one inch at a time.

REPEAT CHORUS

Edited by - ElaineCunningham on 14 Jul 2011 12:57:50
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Kajehase
Great Reader

Sweden
2104 Posts

Posted - 14 Jul 2011 :  17:42:56  Show Profile Send Kajehase a Private Message  Reply with Quote

There is a rumour going around that I have found god. I think is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist.
Terry Pratchett
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Farrel
Learned Scribe

United Kingdom
235 Posts

Posted - 14 Jul 2011 :  18:06:51  Show Profile Send Farrel a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I don't quite know what this says about my sense of humour... I love it!

Bravo and more please
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 15 Jul 2011 :  11:47:22  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
The NEWS OF THE WORLD scandal reminded me of JACK & JILL, a flash fiction murder mystery I wrote a while back. It's up now on my website. Stop by to celebrate Free Fiction Friday. Stay awhile. Have a pint. ::passes the peanuts::

www.elainecunningham.com

My website's home page is a WordPress blog, so clicking the link will take you to the latest post. No worries--if you want the story, click on the Catagories button at the right and select Free Online Fiction.
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Thieran
Learned Scribe

Germany
292 Posts

Posted - 15 Jul 2011 :  12:57:59  Show Profile Send Thieran a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Nice little tale, Mrs Cunningham, thanks for sharing it! I wonder whether "Murdock" instead of "Murdoch" is a typo or an intentional "obfuscation" of some sort? (Probably the former, as you haven't changed the name of the tabloid.)
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 15 Jul 2011 :  13:33:20  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Thieran

Nice little tale, Mrs Cunningham, thanks for sharing it! I wonder whether "Murdock" instead of "Murdoch" is a typo or an intentional "obfuscation" of some sort? (Probably the former, as you haven't changed the name of the tabloid.)



Yes, it's a typo. I'll fix that straight away. Thanks for the heads-up.
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 16 Jul 2011 :  15:02:33  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I'm learning ebooks as I go along. This week I followed the example of fantasy and urban fantasy writers who start ebook series with a $.99 book, which meant repricing HONOR AMONG THIEVES. A novella-length story, 35,000 words, for $.99 strikes me as a pretty good deal.

To read more, see today's Writing Update on www.elainecunningham.com
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sleyvas
Great Reader

USA
5229 Posts

Posted - 16 Jul 2011 :  18:40:51  Show Profile Send sleyvas a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Kajehase

SLeyvas: No English translations of the Kalevala?



I once saw one at a Rennaissance Festival about 3 years ago, and I picked it up thinking it'd be an interesting read. The problem was that it was still written with such old english that I knew that I'd never actually read it. When I want to read stuff like this, I'm interested in stuff to be light and interesting and quick.... so that I drift off to sleep. I picked up a collection of Norse stories a few years back and they were great for being like 10 pages each maybe. They weren't quite written for kids (especially with some of the content), but not for the scholar either. I'm betting I won't be able to find anything easily, but I'll keep my ears open.

Alavairthae, may your skill prevail

Phillip aka Sleyvas
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 29 Jul 2011 :  17:05:03  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Today's post on www.ElaineCunningham.com is "Ravens," a small town ghost story that introduces an unusual partnership between a witch and a hit man.

First published in Modern Magic, an anthology from small press publisher Fantasist Enterprises.

Hope you enjoy the story! I'd be interested in hearing your comments, either on the website or by email (elainecunningham@cox.net.)
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bladeinAmn
Learned Scribe

199 Posts

Posted - 30 Jul 2011 :  06:54:44  Show Profile  Visit bladeinAmn's Homepage Send bladeinAmn a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by ElaineCunningham

Today's post on www.ElaineCunningham.com is "Ravens," a small town ghost story that introduces an unusual partnership between a witch and a hit man.

First published in Modern Magic, an anthology from small press publisher Fantasist Enterprises.

Hope you enjoy the story! I'd be interested in hearing your comments, either on the website or by email (elainecunningham@cox.net.)



On so many levels, this was awsome. I'm better off for taking the time to read it (as always is the case when I read one of your works).
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 30 Jul 2011 :  14:14:18  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bladeinAmn

quote:
Originally posted by ElaineCunningham

Today's post on www.ElaineCunningham.com is "Ravens," a small town ghost story that introduces an unusual partnership between a witch and a hit man.

First published in Modern Magic, an anthology from small press publisher Fantasist Enterprises.

Hope you enjoy the story! I'd be interested in hearing your comments, either on the website or by email (elainecunningham@cox.net.)



On so many levels, this was awsome. I'm better off for taking the time to read it (as always is the case when I read one of your works).



What a lovely compliment. Thanks, bladeinAmn.

Edited by - ElaineCunningham on 30 Jul 2011 15:03:01
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
Moderator

USA
29790 Posts

Posted - 30 Jul 2011 :  14:54:01  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I quite enjoyed it. An unusual partnership, and an unusual problem. I'd like to see more of them.

Of course, I'm also still wanting to see more of GiGi.

Candlekeep Forums Moderator

Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
http://www.candlekeep.com
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 30 Jul 2011 :  15:07:38  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Wooly Rupert

I quite enjoyed it. An unusual partnership, and an unusual problem. I'd like to see more of them.

Of course, I'm also still wanting to see more of GiGi.



Thanks, Wooly. I would love to expand this story into a novel (or two or more).

As for Gwen (GiGi), I don't see that happening. The ownership of that project is too convoluted. I could maybe--MAYBE--get the ducks in a row for a direct-to-ebook sequel, but this would only make sense if Tor released the first two books in e-book format.
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  15:47:31  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Today's "Monday morning musings" post on www.elainecunningham.com discusses fantasy art an invokes the Three Patron Saints of Elvenboobs. Seriously, how can you NOT read that? ;)
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Thieran
Learned Scribe

Germany
292 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  17:04:45  Show Profile Send Thieran a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Very good post - so true!
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
Moderator

USA
29790 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  18:20:19  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Mmm, Kate Beckinsale...

Good points, though. I'm a guy, and I like looking at not-overly-dressed females... But I've commented more than once on the impracticality of some of the clothing worn by women in fantasy artwork. A particular pet peeve of mine is the woman with form-fitting plate armor -- as in, the breastplate doubles as a bra.

I would be happier with more realistic attire on fantasy females. Sure, make them attractive -- just don't expect me to believe that a woman is actually going into battle in a chain mail bikini, or that her clothing gets cut and ripped just enough to remain PG13 without going into R.

Things like that are one of the reasons I've always like the (assumably friendly) jab at Clyde Caldwell that was in The Wyvern's Spur.

Candlekeep Forums Moderator

Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
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Dennis
Great Reader

9933 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  18:43:53  Show Profile Send Dennis a Private Message  Reply with Quote

Well, one can have big boobs and still fight. My bestfriend's sister who has really huge boobs is a martial artist---and she fights damn well. Other than that, let's face it, men (with the exception of Wooly and some others) like their heroines endowed with big boobs, in the same way most women like their heroes' bodies to be bulging with muscles.

Every beginning has an end.
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Barastir
Master of Realmslore

Brazil
1394 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  20:05:28  Show Profile  Click to see Barastir's MSN Messenger address Send Barastir a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Well, Evangeline Lily must be an example of elven body, that's why she was invited to "The Hobbit".
Well, I don't know if a big breast impair fighting so much. However, I think girls that exercise a lot have the tendency to have less fat in their bodies, what could make their breasts smaller. Of course, genetics also affects it, and blonde or redhead women are usually more prone to having big breasts.
I've always assumed that elven girls were more delicate and petite, and so were their body proportions. Even in worlds where they are taller, elves are always considered thinner than the average woman. Besides, even those human girls with more curves would have to protect themselves, and I don't think barely dressed girls make any sense.
I'm not saying it's not good for the eyes... But I also have a lot of female players, and if a man is in full plate, why not having pictures of girls in proper armor and dresses? Cleavage can be present at some moment (one can easily think of some rogues), but it is not for the fights, for sure!

"Goodness is not a natural state, but must be
fought for to be attained and maintained.
Lead by example.
Let your deeds speak your intentions.
Goodness radiated from the heart."

The Paladin's Virtues, excerpt from the "Quentin's Monograph"
(by Ed Greenwood)
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  20:27:57  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dennis


Well, one can have big boobs and still fight. My bestfriend's sister who has really huge boobs is a martial artist---and she fights damn well.


::nods:: Which is why my post dealt with swords and archery, two fighting style in which excessive boobage DOES get in the way.

Slender, willowy elves might not be to every man's tastes. For those who believe that too much of a good thing is wonderful, might I suggest a half-orc?

Edited by - ElaineCunningham on 01 Aug 2011 20:31:32
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Eltheron
Senior Scribe

724 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  21:21:09  Show Profile Send Eltheron a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Heh, I love the term "reasonable boobage".

Personally, I don't go for gigantic, pendulous breasts. More a legs man, myself.

A couple of reasonable handfuls are more than sufficient, in life or in art.

"The very best possible post-fourteenth-century Realms lets down those who love the specific, detailed social, political and magical situation, with its thousands of characters, developed over forty years, and want to learn more about it; and those who'd be open to a new one with equal depth, which there just isn't time to re-produce; and those repelled, some past the point of no return, by the bad-taste-and-plausibility gap of things done to the world when its guardianship was less careful."
--Faraer
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bladeinAmn
Learned Scribe

199 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  21:21:20  Show Profile  Visit bladeinAmn's Homepage Send bladeinAmn a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by ElaineCunningham

Today's "Monday morning musings" post on www.elainecunningham.com discusses fantasy art an invokes the Three Patron Saints of Elvenboobs. Seriously, how can you NOT read that? ;)


Hmmm, while I don't usually associate cup-size with combat, I feel I still may enough knowledge in my mind, heart, eyes, spirit, pituitary gland & libido to effectively rebut some of the statements made. I figure you've researched your claims, I feel I must beg to differ, and simply point out that I believe your technique is wrong. Please allow me to demonstrate.

Regarding busty archers, I'm game. I mean, umm.. I, umm.. I mean, I believe in them!
The following link is of a beautiful girl and is entirely on topic:
http://www.fugly.com/pictures/22346/hot-bow-and-arrow-girl.html

I happen to think her technique is flawless. With this in mind, Beyonce Knowles, Selita Ebanks, Candace Swanepoel, & Erin Heatherton can be my amazons any day (though I'm sure Beyonce would be more comfortable as a 2e multi-classed cleric/mage). They all have varying degrees of cupsize, and thus I think that makes for excellent versatility within my band.

Regarding melee combat, even better. I mean, umm, I, I believe in them here too! I mean I've no problem in close quarters.

In addition to my sexual senses, even my battle senses agrees with female fighters in scantily clad garb!

Think how a male enemy must feel, being all battle hungry, and then the amazons come ready to face him in scantily clad garb! Depending on the amazon's charisma (I assume very high, such as the RL females I mentioned to go w/Arilyn), his sexual senses would most likely interfere with his battle frame of mind, thus giving at least a +4 to the amazons initiative, to hit, and to damage! No other factors need come into play! A show of cleavage in the midst of battle can turn the tide, me thinks - w/every fiber of my being, at that!

Edited by - bladeinAmn on 01 Aug 2011 23:51:25
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Wooly Rupert
Master of Mischief
Moderator

USA
29790 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  21:40:18  Show Profile Send Wooly Rupert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dennis


Well, one can have big boobs and still fight. My bestfriend's sister who has really huge boobs is a martial artist---and she fights damn well. Other than that, let's face it, men (with the exception of Wooly and some others) like their heroines endowed with big boobs, in the same way most women like their heroes' bodies to be bulging with muscles.



I never expressed an opinion on breast size.

I just said I think that the clothing often worn in fantasy art is unrealistic. If a woman is in a casual situation, then yeah, cleavage is not unreasonable. If she's going into battle, wearing nothing more than a fur bikini is not reasonable. And yet, we set very minimal armor or revealing clothes as the norm in fantasy artwork, regardless of the situation.

Actually, we see the same for some men in fantasy art, as well... It's just not as prominent as it is for women.

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Candlekeep - The Library of Forgotten Realms Lore
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I am the Giant Space Hamster of Ill Omen!

Edited by - Wooly Rupert on 01 Aug 2011 21:41:18
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ElaineCunningham
Forgotten Realms Author

2246 Posts

Posted - 01 Aug 2011 :  22:27:54  Show Profile  Visit ElaineCunningham's Homepage Send ElaineCunningham a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bladeinAmn

Regarding busty archers, I'm game. I mean, umm.. I, umm.. I mean, I believe in them!
The following link is of a beautiful girl and is entirely on topic:
http://www.fugly.com/pictures/22346/hot-bow-and-arrow-girl.html


Please note that the archer in your picture is drawing a modern composite bow. It is far shorter than an medieval-era longbow and gets its power from a system of gears and pulleys. The angle of the string is above the bustline. Extend the length of the bow, and that angle changes, making injury more likely.

In all fairness, I've heard different opinions on this matter. As a member of the SCA, I'm aware that some women who compete in archery competitions and combat don't seem to be inconvenienced; however, other female archers find that they need to alter their posture and grip in order to accommodate their proportions. Here's one archer's perspective: http://www.archery-interchange.net/f16/boobs-too-big-25163/

Most female archers wear chest guards to protect against injuries. Here's an excerpt from the Abby Archery website:

A Chest Guard is used to prevent injury to the breast of female archers and to retain loose fitting or blouses or billowing clothing from interfering with the bowstring, especially when the archer is wearing clothing in cold weather or in wet conditions.

The prolonged repetition of pressure from the bowstring can lead to the formation of a lump within the fatty tissue, which is clinically difficult to tell apart from cancer tissue without a biopsy.



quote:
Think how a male enemy must feel, being all battle hungry, and then the amazons come ready to face him in scantily clad garb! Depending on the amazon's charisma (I assume very high, such as the RL females I mentioned to go w/Arilyn), his sexual senses would most likely interfere with his battle frame of mind, thus giving at least a +4 to the amazons initiative, to hit, and to damage! No other factors need come into play! A show of cleavage in the midst of battle can turn the tide, me thinks - w/every fiber of my being, at that!


Maybe, but any man who thinks this way is going to die on the end of that amazon's sword, assuming she's competent. I'm not a guy, but I'm guessing the threat of death, emphasized by a few hard knocks and cuts, will switch a fighter into survival mode no matter WHAT his female opponent is wearing. YMMV

Edited by - ElaineCunningham on 02 Aug 2011 00:41:43
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